The last 4 weeks have been some of the most physically and emotionally challenging times I have ever experienced. In addition to having to leave everything and everyone we know behind, we’ve had to coordinate packing up our lives, driving down and finding a place to live, figuring out which school to send the boys to, and all of the related logistical items like getting social security cards, banking, utilities, and on and on. In the midst of all of this, we’ve been so busy and exhausted to think about missing our old lives back home. Even as I write this, it seems like it was a lifetime ago.

Unfortunately, the overwhelming feeling of homesickness hit both of us full force last Sunday. Through this process, I didn’t think being homesick would be something that would be a problem for me. Of course hearing the boys tell us about missing their friends and Ty still associating Edmonton with the word “home” doesn’t help. But it wasn’t anything I was too worried about. I’m going on record to say I was 100% wrong.

When I woke up on Sunday I think things just came crashing down after everything we had gone through. I felt a sense of, “why did we just leave behind a great life and everything we know and are comfortable with and come here where we are basically starting from scratch.” Following that were questions about whether we did what was best for our family and more importantly, our boys. I mean, this was not a decision we made quickly (about a year from discussing the idea to getting our visa) or without thinking through. But there was a sense of regret that was overwhelming and I couldn’t control the emotion that came along with that. After a lot of reassurance from Christine that we did make the right decision and that we can always go back to Edmonton, I felt better and we went to church (being a newcomer in a church for the first time in 20 years and how that felt is a seperate post in itself). The emotions continued to flow during the service and there were tears shed by both of us. For me though, it was a really encouraging time at a time when I needed nothing better. However, on our drive home, talking to Christine, it was evident that she was feeling the sense of homesickness too. In fact, she even said how she looked around in church and even though we didn’t know a single person, in her mind, she was associating faces with people we know back home and that made it really hard for her.

I think part of the reason God instituted marriage is so that when one of you is weak, the other can be strong. Just a couple of hours earlier, I was ready to throw in the towel and head back to Edmonton, and was encouraged by Christine, and now it was my turn to be the encourager. Though it was incredibly difficult on both of us, we agreed that we needed to look at the opportunities and experiences this would bring instead of how much we missed home. Maybe this will be the most exciting time of our lives, or maybe this whole thing will be nothing but hardship. Either way, Christine and I are determined to make sure the relationships between us and our boys grows stronger through it all. And if that’s the only thing that comes through this time, then it will have been worth it. Of course, we’re hoping for much more, but I think we’re starting to see things in proper perspective.